"Have you ever considered art therapy?"my counselor Shannon said as she flipped through my sketch book, "You are very talented." she said as she looked up and smiled at me. I replied with a grimace, partly because of her high pitched voice, mostly because she was breathing. "Now, Jolene." she started as she handed my sketch book back to me. "Tell me how you are feeling. I believe I am right in saying that you are having some trouble with your mothers's death." Shannon continued.
I sat forward and looked her in the eye. "Are you as stupid as you look? Am I having trouble with my mother's death? That is like asking someone if they can live without a heart beat. I can't sleep, I can't eat, hell, I can hardly even speak to anyone anymore. When I try to sleep, all I see is my mother's death over and over and over. When I eat, I can't help but throw it all up. I am repulsed by the fact that I didn't help her. I can't speak to anyone anymore because something about everybody reminds me of her. I don't even cut myself like a normal depressed person would do. I just imagine all the different ways I could kill myself. So are you happy? I mean, shit, I talked. Can I leave?" I finished.
"I don't think... I need to speak to an adult in authority. Do you have a family member I could call, or...?" Shannon said frantically.
"No. I live by myself. Oh, and I'm leaving now." I said as I flipped her off, and grabbed my leather jacket. I chuckled as I slammed her door on my way out.
Shannon didn't know that I wasn't upset about my mother's death at all, hell, I was ecstatic. Shannon was also unaware that my mother had it coming. Dear old Mother shouldn't have drowned my baby brother in the pool. She was supposed to be there for Jay and I. She deserved all forty two times I stabbed her.